Wednesday 4th October 2023
Report written by Rachel Henry
NB. This report was written by Tom Bigglestone, who wasn't there...but then how did he write such an accurate representation of what happened?
Wednesday 20:33- Franki created group "Run Report challenge"
20:35 Franki : Tom, we've nominated you for the run report. Should you accept this challenge, we will supply you with ten photographic clues and five key phrases.
20:40 Tom: Challenge accepted.
And that was how it happened. GoodGym accepts no responsibility for what is described in this run report. The phrases Tom was given are in bold.
"Well that’s a Mission that will go down in the annals of history! I certainly won’t be forgetting it anytime soon.
It didn’t have the best of starts. Ten minutes into the warm up activity, all a casual bystander would hear was Franki shouting “it’s a points game!” as justification for injuring them all in a desperate quest for victory. If that was bad, her over-zealous approach when Rachel shouted “high knees people” only added to the walking wounded.
Julian was nursing a bruised eye socket which everyone agreed was the shade of bike chain black. On his birthday as well (happy birthday, Julian!). He certainly made some new friends and got some qualifications in small-talk as members of the public crowded around to assist. Pieter, also dizzy, dazed and confused from Franki’s “win-at-all-costs' in-game violence, could only repeat the same two words to any subsequent question: “baked beans.”
When the police arrived to ask Franki what had brought on this torrent of energetic elimination and destruction, all she could say, as she was led off in handcuffs, was *“I had broad beans for tea, from a packet, not a can.” *
And so the mission itself began. The run of 1.07km was completed at a brisk pace. The 70p chocolate bars in the vending machine looked all the more enticing after the recent pause in Bank of England Interest-Rate Hikes. But there was no need - with food aplenty: Miniature Heroes (the only confectionery selection box that doesn’t contain nuts, I found out last week, hence why they’re so popular in schools. And GoodGym tasks, it seems). Plus some rainbow sugary sweets which looked like they had enough e-numbers to kill a small horse.
As always, lots of painting ensued (we could probably all qualify with Checkatrade through practice hours alone). This time it was the skirting boards - our famous wall remains intact!
Luckily the rest of the evening passed without incident. Franki has just been released on bail. With a restraining order. Must stay 100m away from broad beans."
Until next time, if you dare.