There’s salmon from GoodGym here to sweat your shopping

It was the hottest day of the year. One of those days where just sitting in the shade leaves you sweaty, and you wish you weren’t in England, but instead some tropical paradise where when it gets just a bit too hot, you can jump into the pool or the sea to cool down. Alas, I live in London during a global lockdown. With the lidos closed, my annual leave plans changed (although imagine being in a tent at Glasto in 33 degree heat...) and heading to the beach not a sensible option, I had to find something else to fill my day with... A mission for Mrs M!

I knew what I had signed myself up for when I agreed to get Mrs M’s shopping, but the 3 or so miles through Kensington Gardens on my bike were slow and sweaty. As I pedalled up the hill, I felt pangs of jealousy for the sunbathers and the Londoners licking up a Mr Whippy or slurping on an ice cold beverage. I contemplating stopping to lie in the shade with a freshly made 99 but persevered on to be a hero in the heat.

Despite Mrs M’s flat being in the shade, I was still quite literally dripping as I got to her door. Mrs M was lovely, and sorted my her list (‘Make sure you can read it first’), handed over some bags and advised me that Waitrose was just around the corner. I left Mrs M (and a lovely puddle of sweat) to head to the shops, with the parting words ‘Take your time, we’re not in a rush are we?’.

I took those words literally, as I entered the sliding glass doors to Waitrose, I was greeted with a blast of air conditioning. This was it, this shop in Bayswater would be my salvation. Mrs M was clearly an organised lady, and clearly did her shopping here, as the list was in order of the aisles your pass through - fruit first, then past the fish and meats, loo roll at the end...

I took her words to heart, and spend a ‘grape’ amount of time slowly waltzing around Waitrose, and ‘milking’ my time in the cool. Shopping purchased and paid for, I went down the escalators and back into the scorching afternoon sun.

‘This weather is bananas’, I thought, lugging the three bags of groceries back to Mrs M’s. I honestly ‘cod’ not believe it was so hot. I knocked back on the door, and whilst waiting for the flat to be answered, added a little more sweat to my puddle from previous. Mrs M thanked me, & she did offer for me to come in and have a drink, which I unfortunately had to decline (not just because of the whole COVID thing, but also because I didn’t want to risk soaking her sofa).

I left, took off my sodden red t-shirt, and cycled back to the park, where I sat under a tree with a cold drink. The ‘pesto’ both worlds!