It's bleeping baking!

Many thanks to the one and only Task Forcer and Coach Rep John Hunter for this unique run report....

Last night, 33 lambeth runners pegged it 3.2k to our favourite Vauxhall Foodbank to sort and weigh this month's donations.

We split into two groups - the "relaxed" group set off first, followed two minutes and 34 seconds behind by the "less relaxed" or "angsty" group. IT. WAS. HUMID.

On arrival in Vauxhall, we sorted the wheat from the chaff - though nobody had actually donated any chaff - and weighed it all up.

They say a good attitude to take to running is to "leave it all on the tarmac". Well, Jay paraphrased that this week, and left it all at the foodbank - his bag, his wallet, his phone, his house keys, his clothes. 10 minutes after we left, Jay realised his mistake - "No problem, we'll just pop back and pick it up". GUESS AGAIN, JAY. Neil off of the foodbank had already left, and was not coming back until 08:00 tomorrow morning. No clothes or home for you tonight, Jay!

Luckily, we didn't have to do an intensive bleep test in the Pleasure Gardens for 15 minutes immediately after, on this hot, humid September night, where post-Goodgym showers will surely be had by all. OH NO WAIT! BLEEP, BLEEP, and indeed, BLEEP. Sorry Jay. Sweat is just fat crying.

How does Jay's story end? With a sofa bed and an 08:00 trip to the Foodbank.

In other spectacular news, on arrival back at Papa's, runners were met with the spoils of this week's bake-off loser - Louise, of Louisa, or whatever her name might be. Task force member Steve Jenkins, drawing on his Right Move roots, had constructed an ENTIRE MODEL OF PAPA'S PARK FROM GINGERBREAD in what was surely a showstopper to make Mary Berry faint. Yes, an earthquake overnight had done its best to reduce it to rubble, but it was damn tasty rubble. Tom Hunter, all-round Good Dog and fellow Task Force member, had made carrot cake muffins, and lo, they were also delicious. Rebecca pulled off the mysterious magic trick of flapjacks that contained non-melty chocolate chips. Our very own George, who may have run an Ironman recently, said,

"I may have run an ironman recently, but I have never managed to make chocolate chip flapjacks where the chocolate chips have not melted"

What have you been doing with your time, George? Try harder!

So, yes, bake off's loss was our gain, Jay's loss is Katie & Alex's sofa bed's gain. We wish all bake off contestants, and Jay; the best of luck for the future.

We are also VERY SAD to say goodbye to Emma - who after 2 years running with Lambeth is off to live in Cambridge. We trust her to get GG Cambridge up and running very soon. Good luck Emma!

THE END.